i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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