only if we run a train.
done.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Lo siento on account of my penis...
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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