69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
