Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
its liver damage thursday
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
