we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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