In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
