Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
