That's intense
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
