i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Randomize
