My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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