I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
He? As in you personified your dick?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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