I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize