you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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