I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
do nipples grow back?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
