I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize
