i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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