Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
