why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
