I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
