dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
We need to rekindle our bromance
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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