you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
