Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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