Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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