Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats