Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(618): View more from Illinois

In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh

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(802): View more from Vermont

I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.

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(831): View more from California

The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.

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(772): View more from Florida

its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves

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(720): View more from Colorado

I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months

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