Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
