you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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