well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
