You're so nebulous sometimes
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize