sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
