4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
