every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
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My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
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I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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