"it" just moved
I just threw up on my dentist
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize