Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
