He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
she looked like the before picture.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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