Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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