Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
