Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
