i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
