I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
It's rum buckets o'clock
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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