i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
