You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
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Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
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When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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