i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
is that a dick in a sweater?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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