so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
