I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I know her cup size but not her name....
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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