her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Randomize
