It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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