I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Will exercising make me less horny?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
