People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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