idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
