i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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